How to Become a More Attuned Leader.

Why attunement matters

Relationships at work matter. For two main reasons.

The first is that we don’t work alone. We get things done with and through people.
The second is that they influence our motivation, what we think and how we privately feel. In other words, they impact our performance and wellbeing.

That’s why it’s smart to focus on developing more high-quality connections. The more attuned you are, the easier they are to develop.

Think of it [attunement] as operating the dial on a radio. It’s the capacity to move up and down the band as circumstances demand, locking in on what’s being transmitted, even if those signals aren’t immediately clear or obvious.

— Daniel Pink
American author

Attunement matters even more today

Why? Because, as a leader:

You can no longer rely on the power of your position to get things done.
Today it’s about inspiration, purpose, collaboration, and accountability.
It’s why skilfully attuning to the people issues and mastering your human-centered skills matters more than ever before.

But, I bet you know this from your own experience, and as the research shows, that’s easier said than done.

Two in three (63%) employees feel their voice has been ignored in some way by their manager or employer: A third (34%) of employees would rather quit or switch teams than voice their true concerns with management.
— The Workforce Institute at UKG (2021) The Heard and the Heard-Nots

Key challenges to becoming more attuned

Relationships are tricky at the best of times. Different relationships evoke different feelings. They meet different needs. They are complex and subtle. And they don’t stay still as we continuously adapt to each other.

Plus as a leader, you have a range of additional challenges such as:

You’re stretched. You’re super busy and just trying to get through the workload, drive performance, and lead complex change with no guarantees. Yet attunement requires you set your own needs aside when you’re with others.
You’re not a mind reader. Everyone is different and communicates differently. What should you pay attention to? What’s not being said?
You think you’re right. You might be. But awareness of your biases and assumptions would improve your judgement.

I bet you can think of more. And that’s to say nothing of the extra difficult times when you’re worried about burning out and that you won’t have the energy the job demands of you. Or that underperforming staff will hold you back.

It isn’t easy, but in my experience, my biggest people challenges started to melt away (with a corresponding uptick in my performance and wellbeing) as I became more attuned.

The attuned leadership journey

Your journey may be like mine. I started out unaware and, over time, learned what to do. The CEO noticed. They came to me and said:

I don’t know what you’re doing, but can you teach the other Department Heads too?

I’d been able to turn around difficult underperformers into the ones you’d want on your team. I did it by focusing on becoming more attuned to them, from unaware and clueless, to clarity.

Here are the steps I took:

Unaware You have no idea that there’s something that you would benefit from attending to. You may have received some feedback and dismissed it. Understandably if it’s in your blind spot. The key here is to be willing to be open. They just might be right.
Inkling You have a feeling something is going on, but you can’t put your finger on it. Is this a feeling you should be listening to? Start noticing every time you have the feeling. Are there any patterns?
Curious You’re seeing some patterns, but you don’t know what to make of them or what to do with them. From here, start generating some hypotheses that might explain why you’re seeing what you’re seeing.
Experimenting It’s time to start testing out your hypotheses, one by one. As you get more information, you’ll be able to tweak your actions for better results.
Attuned Now you know, you know. It’s a good feeling to be able to trust yourself in this way. To read situations and people and get to choose what to do when. But don’t rest on your laurels. People and contexts change. Never assume. Vigilance is key.

Your next steps

The first step is to ask yourself where you are on your attuned leadership journey. The idea is to start wherever you’re at.

Then remember you’re a person first. So, for yourself, to what extent do you feel:

Listened to at work?
You’re getting the help you need to achieve your own career aspirations?
You’re supported in closing any identified gaps?

Then, as a leader, to what extent are you:

Listening with an attuned ear to your team and stakeholders?
Helping others get more of what they want?
Taking steps to help close their gaps?

If there’s room for improvement, there’s work to be done. So, ask yourself, what impact will being an attuned leader have on your performance, confidence and presence at work? How much more inspired, purposeful, and willing to collaborate will others be when you’re attuned to them?

If becoming more attuned is something you would like to work on, whether for yourself or as a leader, I’d love to help. It’s almost 2025. Start the year strong!

Schedule a time here to set up a no-nonsense, no-obligation call, where we’ll talk about how to achieve your specific goals.

Image by Franz W. from Pixabay