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LinkedIn suggested a connection for me recently. One of my first direct reports. I remember her fondly, but we’d lost touch years ago. It felt a little risky, sending that invite to connect. What kind of reception would I get? Ice cold, or warm and toasty? I was pleasantly surprised – a super speedy YES! Now, the oldies are goodies. But you can never have too many friends, especially when it comes to work and career. They’re the fastest and most enjoyable way to open doors for yourself. And that’s how the project where I’m hand on heart proud got started. All because an Organisational Psychologist in the making approached me for an internship, something I don’t normally offer. I do supervise masters level Organisational Psychology students on placement, but this was different. There was something about her that had me consider her. Polite, articulate and reliable comes to mind. And clever. I thought, worth a shot. Let’s see what she says to this (it’s a little embarrassing): What do you think (about the project)? We can start small and see how we go. I’m not sure if this is something you’d be good at – and my standards are

She was every employer’s dream. Working long hours, had for years and way more than she was paid for. She’d leave work on time so that she could take the kids to their various activities. But after dinner, out came the laptop until the wee hours when she’d crawl into bed. Only to do it all again tomorrow. No wonder, she’d muse, that she’d stacked on the weight, didn’t know when she’d last read a novel and had no idea what her friends were doing. Until one day, at long last, it was all about to change. She’d finally found someone for her 2IC role. She was about to have someone to delegate her overflow to. You’d think, ‘oh the joy’. And yet, she felt out of sorts. At a loss with all that anticipated spare time. This was once a real dilemma of a C-Suite client of mine. Of course, she worked it out. Not with Netflix, that would be less satisfying than work. Rather, she transformed her world by solving her musings, one at a time. Just remember, everything has a season. We’re not robots and something has to give.   Photo by Kevin Ku on Unsplash

You hear it all the time. Ship it. Get it out the door. Done is better than perfect. I‘ve been thinking about that mindset a lot recently. And I’m not sure it’s correct. That’s because for just over a year, I’ve been working on something. I can see the finish line and I’m super-excited! But it feels like it’s taken forever. If you told me at the beginning that it would take this long, I wouldn’t have believed you. Only after the team started on the project did we see just how many moving parts there were. Plus, lots of elements needed to be hand-crafted, rather than off-the-shelf. Of course, as with every large project, just when you think you’re done… you realise you’re not. There always seems to be something else, where it’s not yet good enough. I’m for hand on heart proud. Here’s the thing: Shipping something that’s less than we’re capable of is of little benefit to anyone. Our work says a lot about us. Each project, large or small, adds a building block to our overall reputation. It shows people what we consider worthy of the community we serve. And it’s an insight into the standards

In business today, where contracts are normal and ‘jobs for life’ are just quaint memories, I wonder whether we’re all feeling a little bit more on our own? But what do we do with our fundamental need for security? The inner knowing that we’ll be ok. That someone will be there to catch us when we fall. It doesn’t go away because work has changed. If you don’t have that inner knowing, I bet you’re feeling super anxious right now. Either that or living in the land of denial. Which, by the way, might be a healthy place to visit. For respite. Just don’t stay for too long. Because there will come a time, sooner or later, that you’ll need to face reality. As much as I wish it were true, the world won’t come to you. And denial won’t pay your bills or bring you happiness. Remember most people don’t bite and are happy to help. But they’re not mind readers. You do need to reach out, probably when you least feel like it, and ask.     Photo by Noah Buscher on Unsplash

It happens and it’s never at a good time. The rocky personal relationship. I remember one client having couples counselling in an attempt to save his marriage. It was anything but smooth sailing at home and he found it hard to get enough sleep. He came in one week and said, “I’ve been up since 3:30 am, be gentle with me today”. This was almost normal at the time, the lack of sleep. And it’s true. I would challenge him when his leadership standards slipped. When he was avoiding the almost-daily difficult conversations he needed to have back then. His excuse? “I don’t have the energy”. Yet he knew that when he nipped the problem in the bud, he’d free himself up. A lot. When he tried to improve his leadership and he’d be happy with the attempt. That’s a good start, but my job was to hold him to a higher standard. That’s if he was going to get the results he wanted. Mostly he appreciated it. But some days, like most days when he was sleep deprived, he hated me for it.   It’s a matter of attunement. And precedent. It’s easier to give someone latitude when they’ve

A client of mine is reassessing his priorities. He’s wondering what’s wrong with ‘just’ having a job, versus having a career. On the face of it? Nothing. But there’s something wrong with not realising your potential. What you’re capable of. He’s one of the smartest people I’ve worked with. His apparent wondering is because he knows he hasn’t made the most of his gifts yet. If you forget the yet, it’s a recipe for depression. Yes, there’s a lot to be said for luck. And there’s plenty to be said about your boss and work environment. But there are also things, which you can control. Important things, too. And these have a far greater impact on your results than you might realise.

It’s true. Emotions are contagious. This was abundantly clear last weekend at the Lost Trades Fair. There, I had the pleasure of meeting the sweet 78-year-old lady who makes umbrellas by hand. She said each one takes her around 40-minutes, when she’s on a roll. I found a couple of sewing machine fanatics. My heart rose when I discovered they can repair the hand cranked, red mini Singer my great Aunt gave me when I was a child. Not all currency is financial All the stall holders are masters of their craft. They make what they do look easy. While I’m not sure they make a living from their lost trade, there’s no doubt they love what they do. And that’s what made it a wonderful day. For me, and the thousands of visitors. Everyone I saw seemed to be in a good mood too. These stall holders lead the way. They set the emotional tone. How about you? Are you sparking joy at work too?

“I never came upon any of my discoveries through the process of rational thinking.” — Albert Einstein It seems that thinking time is at a premium these days. Kind of weird considering how many of us are knowledge workers. Isn’t that what we’re paid for? My Mum got me thinking about this last weekend. She’s a very busy 85-year old. She’s so busy being social, playing tennis twice a week and bridge three times, that her only time to really think is in the shower. At least that’s what she said. And she’s retired! I don’t have one place. It depends on the task. If it’s a shorter 1-2 hour job, then my place is a café, with a latte and a carb-loaded treat. But, if it’s something new or bigger? These are the best, but it can feel a bit like playing chicken with a deadline. It takes time to gather ideas and for all the seemingly random thoughts to come together. You can’t know just when that will be. And that’s why, at these times, when you have so many other demands on your time anyway, that the thinking has to happen everywhere. Where do you do your

My first job at the university newspaper was to write the back page of the next edition. What? I’d signed up for layout. Still, I felt obligated. I remembered seeing this mini-poster showing all the grammatical uses of the ‘F’ word. You know, noun, verb, adjective, adverb etc. with examples. I was still a teenager. I took the risk. Next week it was all over campus. It was confusing. I was proud because the risk paid off. I was even told it was the best page of the whole paper. But I’d let myself down. I knew I wanted to do layout because I was too scared to write. The ‘F’ word page was lazy and a stupid protest for not being given the layout gig. I wish I knew then what I know now. Instead, I quit. We usually don’t have the luxury of quitting our jobs when we’re adults. But we do have the luxury of kidding everyone around us that ‘it’s all good’. The truth is, even when you look like a success you know when you’re failing yourself. You can keep yourself from really doing what you want to be doing for a very long time.

That’s me, pretending to be a chef at a cooking class in Hoi An. Don’t be fooled by how confidently I wield that knife. Nor by the snappy chef’s hat. Just because I look like I can cut a carrot into tiny batons, each one exactly the same size and shape, doesn’t mean that I can. And if you think I can successfully translate the recipe onto the plate, think again!   Face your limitations It’s a brave move to face your limitations. And it’s why, when someone asks you something you don’t know, you should say just that. ‘I don’t know’. Because with those three words, you suddenly climb another rung on the respect ladder. Sure, when people assume you know what you’re doing and you don’t, you may be able to wing it and get away with it. But why take that risk? Why do all the hard, emotion work of faking it?   Close the gap A better solution is to close the gap and leave people better off for having asked you in the first place. That might mean you recommend someone who does know. And it might mean you decide to take the time and