Articles

Betty knew there was nothing more that she could do. She’d said ‘yes’. She prepared. She practiced. Her only job now is to stay strong, grounded and present. Connected with her body. That’s a lot when you’re nervous with anticipation. This was Betty’s first public speaking gig! She was standing on the sidelines waiting for her name to be called. Pam Slim’s right. Presenting is a full contact sport. So Betty did what she could. She box breathed. Box breathing helps you manage stress and performance anxiety. Elite athletes use it. So do Navy Seals. You inhale to a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, exhale to a count of 4 and hold again for 4. Breathe deep into your diaphragm. It’s supposed to be easy, so increase or decrease your counts accordingly. Try combining it with visualisation and positive affirmations on the exhale for extra effect. Standing on the podium, Betty looked out at the crowd. A sea of faces 3,000 strong. They weren’t expecting that many. OMG! Strutting into her session last week… You guessed right. She rocked da house! You can imagine what this has done for her confidence. You can imagine what this

They say that birds of a feather flock together. That people like people who are like them. We decide in an instant if someone is: a friend or a foe safe or dangerous part of our tribe…or not.   That’s why first impressions are important. It’s why looking the part matters. And finding commonalities… …if you want to increase your chances of success. Because how your boss perceives you matters. That’s why it pays to start off on the right foot. That’s why it pays for your boss to see you as someone who is reliable or complementary. But what if you’re not? Or you were once, but not anymore? What if you’re considered a foe and not a friend? Chances are that you’re not getting along and you’re not getting ahead. Should you stay or should you go? Maybe the songsters have it right. If you don’t have the answer, Kelly Clarkson suggests you should Walk Away. The Clash know that If you go there will be trouble. If you stay there will be double.   Double for you that is, unless you change your game! I’ve worked with my fair share of bosses who’ve known that it’s them. They’ve

Watching Serena Williams lose the Australian Open tennis this week was inspiring. It certainly wasn’t her game. She played poorly. She looked tense. Angelique Kerber deserved to win. It was because she was so gracious in defeat. Losing isn’t something familiar to Serena. But you wouldn’t have known it. Win or lose, she’s a star. But what about the less obviously gifted? Who still have so much to contribute? Who have a whole lot of potential waiting to be realised? Most likely your boss has decided you can have a spot on the team. But, unless you’re one of the fortunate few, most likely that’s where the love ends. Don’t expect that they’ll whisper sweet nothings about you to their boss. Don’t expect that they’ll consider you for that coveted opportunity. Don’t expect a bonus any time soon.   As one reader so poignantly wrote to me about her experience this week, you’re left to: “grapple with the prickles of failure, shame, guilt and uncertainty”. Imagine instead your boss sees how great you are. Sees you as a contender*. And you get to experience, once again, that great feeling when your future looks bright. When you know you’re in the right

You know that pile of books on your bedside table? I decided to do something about it over the holidays. I decided to not read them! Well, all but one. The rest were respectfully moved to the bookshelf. They don’t need to be a nightly (and morning) reminder of something still not done. They were neither urgent, nor important. And the book I read? It was Gordon Tregold’s FAST. It was important for me to read that. I promised Gordon I would and doing what you say you will do matters. Luckily I’d told him it might take me a while. He sent me a copy in late October. In case you don’t know, Gordon is amongst Inc Magazine’s Top 100 Great Leadership Speakers and Top 100 Leadership and Management Experts. He’s been named the #1 Leadership Expert to Follow on Twitter. Plus, Gordon graciously participated as an expert on the Crack the Leadership Code Season 2 telesummit last year. (Crack the Leadership Code Season 3 is coming in 2016. It’s still in the planning phase so stay tuned for details.) F.A.S.T. made for a great end of year read – a timely reminder that stands for: Focus – Focus on the right things and ensure they stay priorities. Beware

We all come from a family of sorts, for better or for worse. And family dynamics play out at work, for better or for worse. The roles you take up, your attitude to authority – all start at home. And they can enable or disable your career. You may not even realise it’s been going on. My story started when I was in primary school. My older brother used to call me Pizlet. You know, like piglet (because our last name is Pizer). I thought it was funny, an excellent tease. But I hated it at the same time. It made it abundantly clear I was junior. Small. Basically inferior. Like all great marketers he gave me an irresistible solution. On my 14th birthday I would graduate and become a Miss Piz. I liked the idea of graduating.   Mistake #1: Deferring to my older brother as the decider of all things My 14th birthday arrived. I didn’t graduate. I didn’t hang up the bathmat. No good reason. I think he asked me to and I chose to be defiant. The decider of all things decided the consequences… I’d remain a Pizlet.   Mistake #2: Giving him the satisfaction of seeing how much it upset me Over the years, and even when we were

It’s an awful feeling. When you’re doing everything right, and getting nowhere. I see this a lot. Fantastic staff, working hard, but always flying under the radar when it comes time for a promotion. Take my client Betty*. She was great at her job. A senior manager role in her area came up. She thought she was a shoe-in. Instead, the company made Betty’s role redundant and they hired someone else for the position. What went wrong? Sometimes, being great at your job just isn’t enough. People who get promoted think, look, act and feel differently to people who get overlooked. What’s the difference? People who get promoted are already thinking like their boss’s boss. They’re always one step ahead. They think strategically about the needs of the organization. The best way to get your boss’ (and your boss’s boss’s) attention is to make their job easier and your company a success. Let’s say Dick needed another staff member. He could go to his boss’s boss and say: “Kerry, my team is totally overwhelmed. Please, I need to hire a new admin assistant”. Alternatively, Dick could say: “Kerry, you’re aware my team is working on several projects that bring in a lot

Today was my last day with Leya the Intern. Endings always make me sad. When Leya first came on board I wasn’t sure if it was going to work out or not. We both took a risk. From my PhD research, I knew the first day would be critical. The welcome you give makes a surprising difference to their success. So I put aside the whole first day for Leya. Explained her role, answered all her questions, went through how things are done around here and got her started on some meaningful work. I also asked Leya what she was interested in. What she hoped to gain from the internship and then did what I could do craft her role with that in mind. She told me she wanted to learn to be a great coach. So I arranged for her to sit in on some coaching sessions and directed her to some great books on the topic. She later told me how grateful she was that I took the time to welcome her. Here are my tips for getting the onboarding process just right. 1. Put aside plenty of time, even an entire day Nothing says welcome like someone

When was your first stint at leadership? Mine was when I was 11 years old. My Mum had to run to the shop for some missing ingredient and I was left in charge of my younger siblings. Normally my older brother would be in charge but he wasn’t home. I was terrified. What if something bad happened? I was relieved when Mum came home but none-the-wiser. I told myself: “that was lucky” and “I was only put in charge because Mum had no other choice”.   It never occurred to me that she did it because she actually thought I was capable! Not a helpful story to tell myself. Reinforcing that negative emotions are indeed negative. Leya, on the other hand, my awesome intern, had a very different first leadership experience. She was 16. A proud first time junior leader on Summer camp. She had no idea what she was doing. To her horror, on the very first night she was put in charge of 10 kids to coordinate the kitchen clean up. Freaking out, Leya pulled the big boss counsellor aside and said: “Please, I don’t know what to do! Can you assign someone else to be in charge?”

It was the first term of my last year of high school. There were the usual suspects on the school bus. The cool kids, the nerds, the sports stars… and me. The uncool. The only prefect. In the first week Carmen, one of the cool kids, lit up a cigarette. Illegal. Against school rules. Let the games begin. I think she thought I’d never take her on. But I took my responsibility as prefect seriously. So I walked up to her and said: “Put it out.” Carmen: “Why?” Me: “I’m giving you three warnings. This is your first.” Carmen: “Then what?” Me: “You get a detention.” I made that up. I had no idea how to handle it. I thought of baseball. Three strikes and you’re out. She put it out. I walked off, back to my seat and sat down. I’d come across as solid, strong and sure. But my heart was pounding! Two days later: “This is your second warning”. A few more days later: “This is your third warning. You’re getting a detention.” As terrifying as it was to step up and embrace the authority of my role, I’m so glad I did. No one ever put